When my mom introduced my siblings and me to split pea soup back in the early 1970’s. I never imagined it becoming my life-saving food over forty years later!
Hiking at Tea Town in Ossinging NY. I discovered this natural restoration in 1995. It’s the place I took my children as we tried to heal from the pain of divorce.
Not once in a million years did I think I’d make this a healing location for over twenty years now. My wife took this picture on July 14th 2018. My current weight post surgery and due to anxiety disorder and panic. 130 pounds! My average weight is 165 pounds, give or take.
I look horrible!! 🙁
My Anxiety Disorder & Panic Attack!
I have to admit. My life has been very stressful. More so since 2015. The launch of my record label, differences with my children, the unexpected death of my daughters fiancé, the births of my grand daughters, my crazy marriage, the collapse and rebuild of my record label and too much more. I was told by friends when I was a kid that I had a “type A” personality. I never saw it. I thought I was a very laid back person, to a fault!
My brain never shuts down (no ones does) yet mine never goes into neutral. I’m always thinking about something I want to do, how to create my next song, how to promote, new gear, my planes and rockets, family fun, a new dish to cook, always something!
While at the same time. My emotions, of sadness, pain, hurt and anger seemed to never stop. I’d recycle painful events in my life off and on all day. Trying to understand each event. Trying to put it all together. Add to that my type “a” personality and it’s the perfect mix to anxiety disorder and panic attack.
I allowed years of negative thinking and long time stress to build up in my body. The kicker is, I knew how to deal with it all along because of my first round of healing. I simply got tired of my healing practice and wanted a freaking break!
Yes, of course, I know healing is a lifelong practice. I’m ok with that. I look forward to it. Truthfully, “Back in The Dave” is part of my healing practice! Still, I just wanted a break from meditation, eating clean yoga and more.
Had I known taking a break with so much stress still in me, I would have never stopped. Had I known it would lead to mild/moderate anxiety disorder. I would have never stopped!
I’m sharing my experience with you because I’d bet my first Jackson5 45″ record “Mama’s Pearls” that there are at least five people who listen to the show that either are or have experienced panic and anxiety.
When anxiety and panic limit your daily life. It’s time to get help. Anxiety Disorder can be healed. It’s a long and slow process. I’m walking out of the woods more and more each day. There are set back days of course! But you must continue on.
I seriously don’t recommend taking prescription drugs. It tends to make it worst. However, you must do what you feel is best for you. Just know it can be fully reversed and healed. It’s not easy. It’s best to catch it early.
My Symptom’s & Sensations
Neck muscle tighting
Lump in throat
Nasal & tonsals swelling
Along with thick mucus!
Fear of choking while eating. Inability to swallow food or liquid.
Jitters Shaking in my torso/chest
Heart attack feeling in center of chest
Causing jaw sensations
List Content goes here
Panic attacks while driving
over bridges, next to tractor-trailers, in tunnels, single lanes
Feeling disconnected from physical body
For air, because you can’t swallow saliva!
Inability to walk, eat and swallow at the same time
without triggering a choking panic attack.
“Lean on Me”
Lean on Me was a mantra in the African American communities during the early 1970’s. Coming out of 100yrs of Jim Crowe we needed each other in was we could never imagine.
It was a new time for us. Finally we thought we could move ahead with out ole man Jim in our faces. Not so!
Yet a song such as “Lean on Me” provided hope. If nothing else, the belief that we could depend on each other as we moved forward.
It’s been covered by many artists over the past forty plus years.
I further feel the song has remained so relevant because it appeals to the human dynamic.
We all must lean on each other every now and then in life. It matters not, the color of your skin, religion or culture.